Flaming Hearts (Beyond Reality Book 2) Read online

  This afternoon she and Marissa and their “dates” would be going to the spa. This was one of Marissa’s choices of activities for the day, no big surprise there, and Becky knew she’d be miserable. There wasn’t anything about a spa that she enjoyed. She didn’t like having gobs of makeup put on, she knew her hair didn’t hold a style very well because it was thin, and she’d never enjoyed getting a massage. On top of that her nails were short and her feet were so ticklish that pedicures were pure torture. The only good thing about the day would be that Dean wouldn’t be there. Becky sighed. Since they were going off-set only the Director, Eddie and the camera operators would be accompanying them.

  As Becky and Marissa and their dates were leaving the house, Becky couldn’t help but look back toward Dean and found him looking right at her. The intensity in his eyes startled her for a moment, but also warmed her from her head to her toes. He gave her a small secret smile as she walked out the door.

  God, that smile could keep her going for hours. Becky smiled to herself and turned to get into the van to travel to the spa only to meet Marissa’s scowling face.

  “You really don’t think he is interested in you, do you?” she said snidely. She didn’t say anything else as the men from the show were getting into the van. She knew when to keep her cattiness to herself and when to act like Becky’s best friend.

  Becky knew she wasn’t done with the conversation. Marissa would never let the fact she saw a man pay attention to Becky, and not herself, go without making a big deal about it. Becky knew she’d probably come up with all sorts of reasons why the look Dean sent her wasn’t what it looked like. Becky didn’t care. The promise and heat in Dean’s eyes when he looked at her was honest and hot as hell.

  Becky blocked out the inane conversation going on between the other contestants on the way to the spa and daydreamed about Dean. She imagined them on a real date, just the two of them. He’d hold her hand and kiss her throughout the date as if he couldn’t help himself. At the end of the night he’d walk her to her door, back her up against it and start kissing her. His hands would roam her body and when things would start to get inappropriate he’d pull away and ask if he could come up for coffee. Just as Becky was imaging what would happen when they went inside, Eddie announced that they’d arrived. Darn.

  Once they exited the van and went inside the high-end spa, Becky and Marissa were whisked away, with their camera operator in tow, toward the ladies room where they’d change into their robes and be ready to be pampered for the afternoon. Becky saw the camera operator following them into the dressing room was a woman. She wasn’t very tall, but Becky could see she was extremely muscular. She figured she’d have to be in order to hold a camera on her shoulder all day.

  Becky and Marissa had been signed up for the “couples” spa day, which meant they’d spend the day side by side with their dates, and each other, while being pampered. Becky wondered if the men were as reluctant for the day as she was. Probably not. Becky figured they were probably scheming to get Marissa alone at some point, preferably when she didn’t have many clothes on, and wondering if they could ditch her. Derek and James didn’t really seem to be the “spa” type of people, but in order to “win” Marissa she knew they’d do whatever they had to do.

  As soon as they were alone in the dressing room Marissa lit into Becky, finally able to let her true self show through since there weren’t any men around to see her actions.

  “Seriously? You think he likes you?” she snarled. Repeating what she’d said earlier. “From what I’ve heard he’s as rich as hell and there’s no way your mousey fat ass could attract him. Just give it up. Besides, if you so much as try anything with him I’ll report you to Eddie so fast it’ll make your head spin. You’re under contract, just like me, and if you screw this show up for me I’ll sue your ugly ass so fast you won’t know what hit you.” Marissa wound down with a glare.

  Becky just looked at her. Wow, that was harsh, even for Marissa. She wasn’t sure what bug had gotten up her butt but she was sick of being stomped on by her and the other men on the show. It wasn’t as if she and Dean had lay down on the ground and started going at it—okay, that was a great image, but seriously. If one look from a man toward her and not toward Marissa could make her turn into this bee-otch from hell, she had no idea what Marissa would think if any of the men actually dared to actually kiss her.

  She’d had enough of Marissa’s attitude. “Just because I don’t have boobs out to here,” Becky said, gesturing about a foot in front of her chest, “and just because I don’t simper over every single thing everyone here says, doesn’t mean I can’t attract a man. I’d rather someone like me for who I am rather than what I look like or what I wear. And if you think for a minute that the men on this show like you for who you are, you’re crazy. They’re after the money and fame, just as you are. I guaran-damn-tee you won’t have a happy-ever-after ending with anyone here. Oh, you’ll both play the same game and pretend you’re madly in love, but your relationship will end, just like all the others have.”

  Becky took a breath, interrupting Marissa when she was about to snap back at her.

  “So you just keep on pretending you’re little Miss Perfect and that you’d happily end up with any of those men. I’ll keep playing my part and you can “win” this stupid reality show, but if you ever get in my face again you’ll wish you hadn’t. Just leave me alone, Marissa. You play the game your way, I’ll play it mine and we’ll go our separate ways. If you can’t handle another man even looking at me without losing your shit, I feel sorry for you.”

  And with that parting shot Becky tightened the belt on her robe and slammed out of the locker room, leaving Marissa standing there with her mouth open. She hadn’t expected Becky to push back.

  It had felt good. She wasn’t one to speak her mind like that, but Marissa had pushed her too far. Some of what Marissa had said hurt, but she tried to forget about it. She was a bitch, she just had to keep reminding herself of that. What really pissed her off was Marissa belittling what she’d started to feel for Dean and to insinuate there was no way she could ever keep his attention. That hit a bit too close to what she was feeling for herself and had tried to push to the back of her mind. She knew she couldn’t compare to Marissa in the looks department, but damn it, she was a good person and she certainly wasn’t a troll. So what if she didn’t cake on makeup or wear designer clothes, or weigh under a hundred and twenty pounds. Not everyone in the world did, and they still ended up happily married. She’d tolerate the day and get through it, get through the show and go back to her boring life, the way she liked it. Even if it killed her.

  Becky took a deep breath and was about to head out to where Derek and James were waiting with Robert and Eddie and who knows who else from the show, when she noticed the camera woman come out of the dressing room. The camera was hanging at her side for once, and she looked Becky directly in the eyes.

  “Good for you, Becky!” she said unexpectedly. “That bitch has had that coming for a long time now.”

  Becky could only stare at her. Finally, she managed, “Uh…thanks?”

  The camera operator laughed and took a step toward Becky. She didn’t hold out her hand in greeting, probably because she was worried someone would see them, but she came closer so they could talk quietly. “My name is Kina. Me and most of the other camera operators have been rooting for you from day one. Most of us were together in Australia and couldn’t believe the crap that went on behind the scenes with the women on the show. Marissa would’ve fit in perfectly with that bunch. But thank God Alex and Sam were able to work through all that crap and find each other in spite of the way all the others acted.”

  Becky again could only stand there and nod. She’d watched Love in the Outback and didn’t really understand how Alex and Sam even ended up together, since Sam was kicked off the first week.

  Kina seemed to understand Becky’s confusion because she continued speaking. “Becky, Sam wasn’t really kicke
d off the first week. She made it at least half way through the show. Eddie and the other producers only edited the show to make it seem as if she left that early. Alex and Sam had plenty of time to get to know each other. Sam even saved my life on the set one day.”

  “What?” Becky exclaimed fascinated. Crap, she didn’t have time to listen to the story, but God how she wanted to. It sounded like it was an amazing story. She looked behind her at where the others would be gathering and heard Kina speak again.

  “I know, this is a bad time to even have brought it up, sorry. But I wanted you to know that we’re all rooting for you. Don’t let Marissa get you down. You have a friend in each one of us. When she’s acting all bitchy look into the camera and see us standing behind the lens and know that we’re cheering you on.”

  Becky had no idea what to say to the woman, but she didn’t have to say anything. Kina hefted the camera back up to her shoulder and was obviously back in work mode. Becky had a lot to think about. It felt good to have another woman on her side. Hell, it felt good to know the other camera operators were on her side and didn’t think she was pathetic. She took a deep breath and headed toward the group. It was going to be a long day, but deep down inside Becky felt a spark of her old self returning. It was time to stop letting Marissa and the guys on the show make her feel bad.

  * * *

  When the group got back to the house it was time for another ceremony. Becky had been massaged and made up and poked within an inch of her life. She was tired and cranky and didn’t feel like herself at all. They’d stuffed her into a designer dress with two inch heels. They’d wanted to put her in four inch heels, but Becky flat-out refused. There was no way she’d be able to walk in anything higher than the two inches she was currently wearing. Not only did her feet already hurt, but she just knew she’d fall on her face on national television if they made her wear the higher heels.

  They’d teased her hair and put it up in a fancy upsweep and had caked makeup on her face. She’d never had so much on before in her life and she knew she probably looked ridiculous. She only wanted to go and take a shower, put on her stretchy pants and a T-shirt and get back to her normal self.

  That night at the casual meet and greet time before the ceremony, the men all seemed to take extra notice of her. Becky knew it was a result of the spa treatment and not because they suddenly wanted to get to know her. All this crap she was wearing wasn’t her. It was ridiculous that all of a sudden the men were paying more attention to her. She knew Dean hadn’t been there when they’d gotten back. At least she hadn’t seen him, but all of a sudden she felt a tingle up the back of her neck and knew he’d arrived.

  She refused to turn around. She didn’t want to see the same look in his eyes as in the men all around her. Well, she did want to see him looking at her admiringly, but she was scared he’d only look at her that way because of what they’d done to her, not because of who she was inside. She was afraid what he’d think about the new-and-improved her. Afraid that he’d like it too much, and afraid that he wouldn’t like it at all. Gah! She was so confused and so stressed out.

  Finally, after a long day and night, it was her turn to stand in front of the men and make her choices. Robert had done his normal speech and asked the women to choose who they wanted to stay. She still really didn’t care who stayed and who left. For the first time Marissa hadn’t tried to come to her before the show and tell her who to have stay. The touchy-feely, working together times were over.

  Becky knew Marissa had already chosen her favorites, and asked that Trevon leave, so she chose the best of the bunch that was remaining. She actually felt bad she had to tell someone to leave, because she didn’t really even know the men that were left. In another spurt of defiance toward Marissa she’d deliberately not chosen Conner, so he’d have to leave the show. She’d overheard Marissa telling him how much she liked him and couldn’t wait to go on an individual date with him. Well, as much individual as you could get when you were essentially on a double date, date with him.

  “The choice has been made!” Robert boomed once again. Becky felt good about the fact that she hadn’t flinched that time. She’d finally been expecting the cheesy line.

  When it was over and the cameras were shut down she turned to leave to go and shower when Eddie called her name and gestured for her to come and talk to him. She reluctantly went over to where he and Dean were standing. She’d almost forgotten Dean was there, almost.

  “Becky, since you’re one of the stars of the show I’d like for you to take some time and talk to Dean about your role in the show and your favorite parts,” he told her gravely.

  She knew what he was really saying. He wanted her to talk up the show and try to influence Dean to finance his next reality venture. He knew how she really felt, at least he should know how she really felt. With Eddie there was no telling. He was good at ignoring everyone around him and plowing ahead with whatever he wanted to do, damn the consequences. Eddie stood there expectantly, waiting for her to start talking. Awkward!!

  “If you don’t mind, Eddie, I’d like to talk to Becky alone. I think she’ll be more honest if she doesn’t have to worry about pleasing you.” Dean put his hand on Becky’s elbow and led her toward a set of chairs just off the set.

  Eddie had no choice but to let them go. He was sucking up big time and he didn’t want to do anything his future investor wouldn’t like. He didn’t go far, but at least he was out of earshot.

  “How are you doing, sweetheart?” Dean asked in a low voice, helping her to sit but never letting go of her arm.

  Becky looked at Dean, thrilled they were getting a chance to talk, but also nervous as she wasn’t sure where they stood now. She shivered as his fingers caressed her elbow covertly.

  “I-I’m fine.” She stumbled over her words, then continued, “Are you really going to invest in another reality show?” She couldn’t help it, that just blurted out. Even with Jonathan telling her he wasn’t really going to invest she had a hard time believing he’d go to the lengths he had just so he could see her. She didn’t really believe he’d want to invest in something as silly as a reality show, but she didn’t know him all that well. She wanted to hear the confirmation from his lips directly.

  “Of course not!” Dean exclaimed. “Why would I invest in something as ridiculous as this kind of show? But it was the only way I could think of to be able to be close to you for the next few weeks.” He winked as he said it.

  Becky was flattered, but the day had taken a toll on her and her confidence, even with the pep talk she’d gotten from Kina and from herself.

  “Why, Dean? I mean, it’s not like you’re hurting for women. Why work so hard for me? I’m nobody special,” she finished honestly, looking him in the eye.

  Dean turned his chair around so they were face to face instead of side by side and leaned in close. Not too close so it’d be inappropriate to anyone who might be watching, but close enough he was looking her in the eyes and somehow talking straight to her heart.

  “Becky, I told you last night, it’s you I want to get to know. There’s something about you, something true, something that speaks to me. I’ve never felt this way before and I want to see where it goes. And you’re the most beautiful woman in this room and the most beautiful woman I’ve honestly ever seen.”

  Becky snorted. “Yeah right, Dean, give me a break! I’ve never been called beautiful by anyone before, and no matter how much makeup I’m wearing right now I know it’s still not the case!” She was embarrassed at her outburst and dropped her eyes to the ground between them.

  “Becky,” Dean said urgently. “Please look at me.” When she didn’t look up, he continued, “I want to put my hand under your chin and raise your head so you have to look at me, but I know that would look strange to Eddie and other people. Please. Please look at me.”

  Becky raised her head and managed to meet his eyes. God, she was so courageous and beautiful to him. “It’s not what you’re wearing, or what y
ou look like on the outside, although you are beautiful on the outside…it’s who you are inside. You’d never tell anyone they were stupid, or not be a friend to someone based on the way they look. You appreciate animals and would do anything to help them. You’d rather wear sweats and be comfortable than put on heels and a fancy dress and hobnob with the most important people in the world. That is what I find beautiful about you. In fact…” he continued earnestly, “I much prefer you in your jeans and T-shirt than that dress and your hair done up and your face covered in gunk.”

  Becky giggled. He sure knew how to make her feel better. She saw he wasn’t smiling back at her. He was serious as he could be. God, what she’d give to not be here, to be able to snuggle down into his arms and rest her head on his chest. To feel safe.

  Dean tried to relax. God, he wanted to haul her over his lap and hold her close to his chest. He wanted to kiss the hell out of her so everyone around would know she was his. He wanted to mark her as his. He could just imagine how a hickey would look on her neck. Juvenile, but he couldn’t help it. He couldn’t stand it when the men on the show were ogling her before the ceremony. He was surprised at her looks when she got back from the spa, but he was being honest with her when he’d told her he preferred her other look. Done up the way she was now she just looked fake. She looked stiff and uncomfortable. He much preferred her in her natural state.

  “Did Jonathan give you the phone?” he asked Becky, scooting his chair back a bit and leaning back. If he didn’t change the subject and put some space between them she’d end up in his lap no matter who was watching. He didn’t want to give Eddie any reason to suspect he was anything other than an investor.